Recently, I had a rendezvous with someone that I thought was the right guy for me. I honestly felt we could be in a long-term relationship. He CLAIMED he wanted me to be his girl etc. Over the weekend, we had fun until it came down to .... Now, those of you who know me know this is an important aspect, but not necessarily. We were happy... so I thought. When everything was said and done we ended whatever we had and now we don't talk at all. Everybody knows about my past I'm sure...but I'm trying to figure out why this hurts so much. Its an annoying and aggravating feeling. Something that I never felt before for an individual of the opposite sex. We talked so much...and we were truly friends. After all was said and done, we no longer have contact. Yes I like him, but no we could not be together. He was in no way shape or form ready for a mature relationship. We could have remained friends but HE chose to terminate that...so I'm left standing at a crossroads. Did I honestly cause this on myself? YES I probably did. I mean I saw the signs...I knew that I should have ended it months ago. And yet I let it continue. All for the satisfaction of having someone that I felt would grow into a good man. I'm disheartened but I'm more so angry. I want to toilet paper his house lol. I want to put a hit out on him. Yes, I was in the wrong but he never gave me a chance to explain how I felt. So while I'm having a fucked up Thanksgiving trying to figure out my next step, I have the memory of what could have been. I know that some of you have experienced this, (much more than me) but it hurts that much more and makes me more jaded.
Again, I caused it on myself...but I want him to feel what I'm feeling. So, I want yo guys to weigh in on this...BE HONEST...
p.s. I'm having a horrible day as well lol. My uncle's car would not start this morning FML
